June 6th

While training near the hamlet, one night the leaves changed colors suddenly. Every tree was a beautiful golf, reddish gold, or orangish gold. It was a beautiful fall, and only odd because it happened all in one night. They asked Peter the peasant if this were normal, and he said it was actually a late fall.

The party picked up their things and visited some kings starting on the 2nd day of Uktar. They went off to see King Arthur in the Indigo kingdom. He was a small, petty man with a massive crown. He was convinced all the other kings wanted to take his kingdom and split it up. They all had better things, but they wanted to take away his things. He could not spare any men because he knew that if he did he would be attacked by the stronger kingdoms. However, he agreed that if each other king pledged men, he would match them.

They visited King Logan of the Orange Kingdom. He was a beautiful man, tall and blond, with a beautiful wife to match. He was proud, convinced that no one could ever threaten his kingdom. However, he finally conceded that 14 Orangemen could lead the army to glorious victory.

Then moved on to King Nevan of the Blue Kingdom. Nevan was in his pajamas, sitting in a day bed with his crown upon a knee. His chief guard, Bernard, was reading a book to him. He was incredibly lazy, and really didn't feel like making his soldiers find some weapons and go fight. Eventually he was convinced that it might be a good idea in the long run, and he had Bernard sign some papers promising 14 soldiers.

They then moved on to violet, the land of love. King Farley was half clothed and he had a beautiful body. There were silks and cushions everywhere for the various men, women, and sheep throughout the kingdom. At first he was convinced that the pirates were probably just misunderstood and needed some love, but eventually he too committed soldiers. Though his soldiers were more proficient with dildos than swords, they were at least very fit. Farley also told them that a Huntsman had come here after the battle of Seaport when the pirates invaded. He hadn't seen the fellow in a while, but he had given him a room. When they went to see him, they saw it was just a 14 year old kid, and he'd hanged himself. The kid was a Huntsman in training, and he had fled the battle as he should have done. However, the kid had left a note that he couldn't live with being a coward.

They found the Yellow Kingdom was all about wealth. King Dallon wanted money. He had a very ugly wife, Bethesda, but she came with a big dowry. Neither the king nor his queen were ashamed of this fact. They were willing to commit soldiers only when the party told him that the pirates would eventually come take his money, and that if they struck first they might take money from the pirates.

Then they moved on to King Baston of the Green Kingdom. This man was obese, and he wasn't ashamed of it. All of his guards were somewhat portly. These people believed in eating good food and a lot of it. He figured that the pirates might have some cows or pigs, and he didn't want the poor people of Seaport to starve.

Then the party went one more time to the Red Kingdom and King Kirkwell. Once it was explained that there was going to be a great battle, Kirkwell agreed. He also wanted his Red men to lead the men into battle. In fact, when the party came to pick up the troops, the king himself was among them a ready for battle.

The men were broken into two main groups, which would attack the Silver Spires from two sides. The green troops, who were not very good at running, came with the party on the airship to attack from the spires. The men who could not march quickly were alright going down the stairs. The battle itself was fought to the bitter end, and the party took out the two strong captains. Then they picked up some stuff from the fallen pirates and a bit more in a moment of darkness. Literal and metaphorical. The city was liberated, and now there remained the pesky task of the green dragon.

The party dropped off all the other soldiers and arrived at the Violet kingdom last. Some members partook of some available women for the evening before the party resumed their journey. Signy also felt that Farley was incredibly hot, and they got together and started making a 1/4 Drow baby. That will be fun to deal with later. They had heard on the boat from a soldier from Orange had spotted what he thought was a wounded Pegasus with a rider on the back flying into the Troll Hills way back, just after the battle where the pirates invaded Seaport. The party set off for the black tower. There they met the rider named Patrick. He had gone to the wizard for help, but his Pegasus had not made it. He had been unable to fly and landed among the trolls. Patrick made it and mourned the loss of his Pegasus, and he was unable to get away from the tower on his own. The wizard said it was none of his business and he should not interfere, but Patrick was welcome to stay if he were willing to help with his garden and do a little hunting. The wizard was named Prometeo, and was AWESOME. He was pleased that people had battled their way through the Troll Hills to may homage to him. He did not show anything magical, but he did express how great he was.

Then the party headed off to look for the dragon. They spotted him from a distance and began following, but they could not keep up. They also spotted two men on horses going the same way. One was an old man with white hair and a white beard. He wore grey plate mail and a white cloak with the symbol of Torm on it. His name is Varick Sunreep, a paladin of Torm. He said many knights of this land worshiped Torm, and many came to his temple to be anointed. His temple was just to the east of the mountains around Mt Hadeel. He was also entrusted to guard two golden eggs. Presumably, these are gold dragon eggs that have not hatched for some reason. Kaxalattic stole the eggs, and Varick did not know where they were. He left a boy in his training, Ben Ramsey, to watch the temple. Varick is old and soft spoken, but a noble warrior. All he wants are the eggs, any other treasure is no interest to him.

The other fellow on the horse was a bard, Tartleton. He is less than awesome. He is eager to join the adventure to write the song about the heroes who went to slay the dragon. He is an obnoxious fellow, and the rogue is probably going to stab him in the back at some point.

The party traced the dragon somewhere in the area of the Highlands, and eventually determined his lair must be behind Skyfalls just below the white kingdom of the goatfolk. They talked to some goatfolk and also went to find a pseudodragon they spotted. His name is Yabon. He likes fish and doesn't remember anything else from more than a few minutes before. Yabon is willing to hang out with them, but who knows if he'll remember that tomorrow?

The party is poised to enter the cave on the 8th day of Nightal. Winter looms.

I will never play in character again! Nope, not ever!

I am going to get all "Sam-ri" on you, Mark!

Nice.

The good part about not playing with women is that no one is going to get horribly offended when I suggest you ask the priest to cast a very slightly modified version of Remove Disease.

Remove Parasite?

I was going to ask aboot "remove curse"...

I'll bet we can convince our wizard to create a "Falcon Punch" spell.

I just swallowed my gum. Thanks.

Nice.

Full review later, but:

1- Bestow Curse is probably the go-to spell for this. http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/bestowCurse.htm

There's a limit to the power of this spell, but not the variety.

"
# -6 decrease to an ability score (minimum 1).
# -4 penalty on attack rolls, saves, ability checks, and skill checks.
# Each turn, the target has a 50% chance to act normally; otherwise, it takes no action.

You may also invent your own curse, but it should be no more powerful than those described above. "

Now, you can pick one of those three, or invent your own. This is pretty clearly supposed to be the "I curse you with impotence!" spell. "Barren" should be a pretty valid curse here.

Another possibility is that we just sort of hang around somewhere. Since Signy's babydaddy is the king of a tiny kingdom, that would imply we hang around violet for awhile. Which, ultimately, would do more to assure our genetic representation than anything else in this campaign. So that might not be a great idea, but it's not a terrible one. Of course, none of our characters are aware of Signy's altered state yet.

Of course, we DO have access to MAGIC. I could research a SPELL to do something totally AWESOME. The AD&D net book of sex seems to lack a spell to delayed gestation, though it does have proof against pregnancy and of course the impregnation rates (which are a little too high, I use different numbers).

A transmutation (or trans/necro) spell with a day long cast time, culminating in the fetus being exported to another plane in temporal stasis, the body changes reverted, and a passphrase being present to unlock the change over the course of a day, would probably do it. That would allow Signy's 1/4 Drow or Drowess (mechanically I'm pretty sure that's just a human) offspring to be safely and happily brought into the world in a few years, when mommy's career as a serial spiked chain murderess is at an end or at least a pause. Lantaan for sure is a fine place to research stuff, and though spell research is not cheap, we actually have some money now (and will probably have more after we successfully hand the airship back to their retarded creators).

I'd think that would be the best way to do it. Let Signy decide later.

LIES!!