dinner for tomorrow?

What, are we out of Oreos?

I was thinking Chinese or pizza...

Can't we dine in Hel tonight?

What if we used the kitchanette and made something like burritos or pasta?

I'll probably be devouring salty PC tears for dessert, but burritos are an excellent main course!

The PCs were unfortunately victorious without even having to pay for a true resurrection. I think this is because I didn't deal bite damage to Ash when swallowing him. But really, I think we needed a yellow dragon throwing arcane spells or something. White, blue, green, red, and black clearly weren't enough!

I hope you trip and sustain a particularly nasty scrape on your knee.

I'll pour lemon juice on that scrape just to make sure that the message rings home.

I am, of course, kidding. The dragons were what they were- one representative of each in a small squad tasked to do exactly what they were doing. While there are off color dragons, they aren't represented on the evil dragon council, so adding a yellow was out of the question. I didn't apply bite damage because I reasoned that might take more time to do both the gulp and the attack- given that the dragon in question didn't have improved grab, and I was improvising (swallowing isn't a defined action for a dragon baseline), and I want to model the dragon accurately, not just choose what would be cool or difficult or easy.

Note that you did manage to scoop up some loot from them- Zeli hurrying you along didn't mean you couldn't grab some necklaces- but you didn't have time to butcher them up as PCs are wont to do, searching for every last gem and gold piece wedged betwixt their scales. Also, you probably shouldn't do that in front of a gold dragon.


I have been at this airport a couple hours now. The media has been ZIMMERMAN ZIMMERMAN ZIMMERMAN UH-OH PROTEST ZIMMERMAN HE'RE A PICTURE OF HIS WHITE FATHER SCOWLING ZIMMERMAN ZIMMERMAN RACISM ZIMMERMAN.

Fucking Ass. You know what I want to see? I want a two headed dog to be born. There could be a video of two little puppy heads licking each other, and someone could all it Pupberos and everything would be great

THERE IS A WOMAN OPENLY WEEPING ON THE TV BEHIND ME FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

I had lots of "justice wasn't served! Black men can never get a fair trial" bullshit on my news feed. I considered responding, but I decided that it really wasn't worth it in the end. One of the responses I considered was "Anybody remember OJ?"

I do think there was something inconsistent with the fact that a 7 year old is more helpless than a naked wizard unconscious on the ground. That's a moo point given the relatively low cost of raise dead now, but still worth considering.

Also, later, I will peel the scab and apply some salt to go with your lemon juice. That way you can have a personal motto "Never forget the scrape!"


I love the notion that Zimmerman should have been convicted based on statistics. "Hey, listen, it looks like self defense, but we've been shitting on the blacks for a while. It's about time we throw them a bone and convict you. It will really ease race tensions. Thanks for taking one for the team."

I guess it's not surprising, but the Daily Show went on a tirade as well, and they also missed the point. Somehow it seems to be relevant that the 911 dispatcher told him not to follow the kid. Somehow it's relevant that Zimmerman was suspicious of a kid who ultimately had Skittles. I don't understand why otherwise smart people are stupid in this.

Zimmerman followed the law as far as we can track it. Then it comes down to who started the fight. (1) If Zimmerman started a fight and ended it with a gun shot, he's guilty of murder. (2) If Martin started a fight and it was ended when Zimmerman shot him, then Zimmerman is not guilty. (3) If no evidence proves that Zimmerman initiated the violence, then he is not guilty. Being suspicious and following someone is not starting a fight. The jury reviewed the evidence and went with #2 or #3.

So why the fuck is this not over?

The seven year old was grappled, but not considered helpless. So how could she be killed with a readied action?

I have always allowed this, is the simple answer. For a mechanical solution, assume that I allow someone to ready a coup de grace with a full round action (normally only standard actions can be readied, and coup de grace is full round). More relevantly, consider that the wretch had more than one full round to prepare for his threat, moving the knife into position. A five foot step plus coup de grace makes assumptions- such that you are approaching a helpless target. In this case, he had several rounds to get a target under control and move the knife into position, such that all he has to do is slide it forward into yielding flesh a couple inches- he doesn't have to step into position, move a sword in an arc, or carefull aim for a vital spot- all that is handled.

Meanwhile, the dragon did a lot more with that one round- he was in a hurry to move amd to get the target out of potion / familiar / spell range, as adventurers are often willing to heal and revivify- his goal was to keep a target not ressable / healable, and he had to do it quickly.

The wretch did not have resurrection in mind- just a desperate plea to save the dragons he is bound to for a few more seconds.

FWIW, I assume we grabbed the dragon cleric's holy symbol thingy as a minimum.

The dragon doesn't bother me (aside from the fact that you're a bit of a twat for "Where are the colossals?" in the first place). I don't recall if you made any sort of attack roll. I want to say that it should have been a "don't roll a 1" situation, but at the same time, I could see it as a sort of opposed grapple check and Ash was in no position to put up much argument.

I can see readying half the coup de grace, and it makes sense to be standing over a fallen, unconscious enemy with your sword on his throat saying "Step back or I finish him off." In this case, I still think it should have been a readied attack against a grappled opponent. I believe there are some rules for completely overpowering someone in a grapple, but maybe not. I don't think the outcome would have been any different. But let's say the red dragon had picked up that 2nd level fighter instead. I think would say that 7 year old:2nd level fighter::2nd level fighter: colossal red dragon in the context of "You will not even remotely consider the change of ever winning this grapple." The dragon could ready an attack on a fighter in his claws, and he could then strike at will. It's assuredly going to kill him. But... it still requires an attack roll. If one of us had managed to piss off a colossal red dragon early on, we would be quite cross if you didn't even allow us the 1 in 20 chance that the dragon bites his own thumb instead.

I agree it makes sense from the perspective of imagining it in your head, but D&D just doesn't really have rules like that. Thieves don't step out of the shadows and cut someone's throat. A single, well-aimed arrow kills no one. No one is having a pleasant chat with a friendly NPC when a sword suddenly goes through their back and they fall dead. Those things are all plausible in the fantasy settings, but not D&D. Even weak bastards get a chance.

I think the point I'm making is that he rolled all that stuff offscreen- by the time you saw the girl she was inches away from death. If he wanted to, he could have killed her long before then. The dragon did actually roll for swallowing Ash (it was in fact, don't roll a 1). The well aimed arrow absolutely has a place- just not as a combat action. What you saw wasn't combat- it was the end result of combat that happened off screen.

You were the result of something that happened off screen.

Uh oh, Zem's waving around his tiny natural one again!

Time to start looking at available times for the next session?

August 3: Out
August 10: In
August 17: In
August 24: In, but I might not be available until 6pm or so.

I believe I am available any of those dates Chris is. I would rather not do the 17th because I have tickets to the Rapids game but if it's our only option I guess I can make it happen.

At this point I'm good with those.

August 3: Out
August 10: Out
August 17: Out
August 24: In

You know, upon rereading, I may not have given this enough consideration, given Zem's expertise on grappling both 7 year olds and naked wizards. On the ground.



Super!

I'm going to slap you in the testes.

Ok but seriously, does this mean we have the 24th?

Seriously.

And I love the quote.

And really, I am sorry. This is just a very busy time of year for me.

I'll do what I can to get out of my commitment as early as possible on the 24th.

I think we still need confirm from Keichi and Rigby?

I believe that the 24th will work, but I think that there may be some girly thing going on. I'll have to get back to you on that here shortly.

And of course all of this is assuming that I make it back from the land of the frozen north...